‘Wait!’ I exclaimed. ‘Since everyone is here, I’d like to announce a decision I’ve made!’

The family looked at me expectantly. I had thought about it all day. If I were to act, it had to be soon.

‘I have decided to celebrate, actually celebrate, Christmas in July! I want turkey and stuffing and each of us can even have a present!’

‘Turkey? Shouldn’t we have something summery?’ Kat asked.

‘Nope, I want Christmas food!’ I said.

This is completely self-indulgent. I have worked retail for twelve years, which has completely ruined the holidays for me. I always have to be at work at something like 4AM the day after Thanksgiving, and this past year I even had to work Christmas night, essentially to make the store look like Christmas never happened by the time we opened on the 26th.

Who says this has to happen in December? Feh.

I’ve got vacation coming to me starting the 23rd, so on July 25th, my family and I will turn off the phones, leave the computer turned off, lay around in our jammies, open presents, and stuff ourselves with turkey and all the fixin’s. I’ll probably throw on some Christmas MP3s for good measure.

Working retail will not ruin Christmas this year!