Howefitz Blog

It’s no secret that I’ve been stressed lately. I’ve blogged about it, tweeted about it and ranted about it to friends, family, and anyone who happens to be standing close to me at any given time. It’s funny, since for a while I’ve tried to project a fairly care-free, nothing bothers me attitude. But lately, none of the pieces seem to fit.

I’ve already blogged about how my kids help out with all the stress, but there’s something else that helps me when I’m stressed that I hadn’t thought of in a while. Something that you could say began in my teenage years. Something that I can only do when I am alone.

When I was a teenager, I went on a couple of backpacking trips. I actually live near the mountains that we would climb. At any rate, I remember the first trip like it was yesterday. I remember we climbed the mountain during the new moon. The lack of moonlight and city lights allowed the stars to show me their true brilliance. My midwest mind could hardly conceive of that many stars.

Surrounded by mountains, the sky lit up in pinpricks above me, I began to feel terribly insignificant. With all of that wonder, what good was I to the world? What did my pinprick of a life in the great spacetime continuum actually mean? I wrestled with this for several days.

The trip was with a church group, so we had daily devotionals in the morning. When it came time for my turn, I was still thinking about the mountains and stars and began to realize that I am part of all of that! I may not be able to move mountains or create stars, but I am part of that creation, and I owe it to myself and everyone to be the best person I can possibly be. My devotional consisted of explaining this to the group, and letting them know that they are equally important. When you feel down and insignificant, do yourself a favor and stop to look around you. Look at all the stars, planets, animals, fish, whatever you enjoy and think about what the world/universe would be without them.

Then think what it would be like without you.

Fast forward to today. Under religion, my  facebook profile says ‘Raised Christian, forming my own opinions’. I no longer label myself ‘Christian’ so much anymore because there is so much out there. I can’t discount the teachings of Buddha and Mohammed any more than I can those of Jesus Christ.

And then there’s Science…

I always enjoyed science in school, but I didn’t think a whole lot about it outside of school. It was interesting, but not necessarily fun. Sometime after school, I discovered Quatum Physics and Cosmology, and that all changed.

Thinking about the very base elements of Creation and Life, at least to me, is a BLAST! The origin of the universe is a great puzzle, and I love to see what the ‘great minds’ think about it.

So I was wandering through the library yesterday and saw a book called ‘Endless Universe: Beyond the Big Bang‘ by Paul J. Steinhardt and Neil Turok. Something attracted me to it, and I’m so glad I picked it up.

Having the understanding wife and family that I have, I was allowed to lock myself in the bathroom, draw myself a bath of hot water and epsom salt, soak my weary bones, and read.

As I began reading the theories about a cyclic universe, my head exploded with ideas. Things I could write stories about, things I could change in my own life. There is something about these great, some would say truly unanswerable questions, that fires up my imagination.

And I thought of those backpacking trips. Of my revelation that I am part of this great creation. Whether you believe in a God or the Big Bang, you are a part of this. What will you do with that power?

As for me, I believe my responsibilities lie with me and my family. Being the best person I can be, helping others and supporting my family, is the awesome responsibity that has been thrusted upon me.

I’ll try to be worthy of my post.

Some other recommended reading:

‘A Brief History of Time‘ by Stephen Hawking

‘The Elegant Universe‘ by Brian Greene

‘Time Travel in Einstein’s Universe: The Physical Possibilities of Travel Through Time‘ by J. Richard Gott

Incidentally, you may have noticed a new feature of the blog: next to most of the links, you’ll see a little book icon. When you click on that link, a window opens within the blog that gives you an article from Wikipedia, a link to amazon.com, etc. This is all thanks to a plugin I recently installed called Apture. If you’re looking for an easier way to add links to your blog, I would highly recommend it!

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